Overwhelmed? Lets Explore It!
Jun 28, 2026
Overwhelm is something I find myself talking about with clients frequently. It's an interesting experience to explore, because it has to do with the belief in our capacities, and what the external and internal demands of our lives ask of us. Each of us has different thresholds for overwhelm in various arenas of our lives.
An expressive arts therapy coach I worked with many years ago said to me, “Overwhelm is a choice.” This is a statement I have pondered often since then. It changed my life as it gave me a sense of agency when I felt overwhelmed.
It has also taken on new meaning with my deepening understanding of the menopausal transition.
“Overwhelm is a choice” brings us face-to-face with moments where we fall into victim mindset. When everything feels like it's too much for us, which choice makes more sense: adding more to create balance, or removing things to restore it? Most of us are taught to try the former (prove you can handle even more!), but lets look at it from another perspective.
Imagine this:
You're carrying a heavy backpack up a hill. Halfway through, it starts to feel unbearable. Your shoulders ache, your back hurts, and every step takes more effort.
Would you add more to the backpack to balance the weight?
Or would you take a few things out?
Obviously, you would lighten the weight in the backpack by removing some items. Why do we metaphorically do the opposite more often than not?
Menopause can feel a lot like that heavy backpack. Hormonal shifts, less resilience in the face of stress, poor sleep, a busy schedule, unfamiliar bodily responses, longing for alone time, decision fatigue, and the pressure to "do it all" can leave us carrying more than our bodies, minds, and spirits were ever meant to. Yet, our brains are changing too, and we start to see the fallacy in continuing to drain ourselves day after day because our capacity is changing.
Balance comes from removing what no longer serves us, and getting very honest about where we no longer are willing to put our energy. And you don’t have to feel shame or guilt about it. No apologies! This is part of the wisdom of menopause (and if you a post menopausal, this can be equally helpful for you!).
Think of it as an experiment. Ask yourself these 3 perspective shifting questions:
- What am I telling myself is extremely important, but actually does not need my attention right now (ex: creating boundaries with technology can go a long way toward creating more ease in daily life)?
- What could I delegate to someone else, say “no” to, or schedule for another time that would create more spaciousness in my day/week/month/year?
- What unmet needs do I have in this moment that I could attend to and that will help shift my perspective? For example: Do I need sleep, nourishing food, connection, alone time, a break from screens, or hydration?
Please consider taking action on your answers to these questions. What could you take out of your backpack today?
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